Dad, Can We Keep It? Raising Eco Kids One Swap at a Time

Welcome to the world of second‑hand parenting, where preloved toys, toy swapping, and reuse aren’t just saving money, they’re teaching our kids values, reducing waste, and making cool memories along the way. In this post I’ll walk through how I turned “keep it” from impulse regret into a deliberate eco‑dad choice.

Spoiler: it doesn’t require perfection. Just small shifts with big cumulative impact.

The Problem: Toy Waste Is Real

Before we get into how to do it, let’s see why it even matters.

• In Australia, households discard nearly 27 million toys per year - roughly 87,000 tonnes heading into landfill.

• Over half of new toys sold become waste within a year.

• Many plastic toys are made with chemicals, non‑recyclable parts, or intricate components that make recycling nearly impossible.

• The traditional “linear economy” (buy, use, toss) is failing the planet. Choosing second‑hand helps us step toward a circular economy.

So when my kid tugs at my sleeve in a toy aisle, I now see a learning opportunity. Admittedly, much to the groans of my kids – because everyone knows how much kids love when their parents turn fun outings into learning opportunities.

Why “Yes” to Some Second‑Hand Things Has Power (and Doesn’t Mean Soft on Clutter)

Saying “yes” to second‑hand doesn’t mean “yes to every second-hand thing”. It means mindful “yeses.” Here are some of the things I’m considering when I favour pre-loved:

1. It’s cheaper, often drastically so

You can get high-quality, durable toys at a fraction of the cost of new ones, leaving room for other investments (or just fewer late-night regrets).

2. It extends the life of stuff

A toy that’s gathering dust in someone else’s house gets another chapter. That’s real reuse.

3. It teaches kids value

Ironically, pre-loved toys teach kids the value in not throwing things out. Specifically, it teaches them the value of passing on their toys to others, or accepting them from other people, rather than them ending up in the bin.

4. It lowers the environmental cost

Fewer new toys manufactured means fewer resources extracted, fewer emissions, less waste, etc. Over time, that adds up for the environment.

5. It connects you to community

Through toy libraries, swap events, and local parent groups, you meet other parents and families with similar values. It can be a fun way to meet new people, especially as a busy adult.

My Dad Strategy: How I Let “Keep It” Be a Win

We all know it’s too easy to say yes to our kids. Here are some tips I’ve been using that have been giving me fairly reliable success. I’m still human, it’s not always perfect – but it’s better.

Step 1: Pause & Check

When my kid begs, I pause. I ask:

• Do we already have something similar?

• Can I find a preloved version?

• Will this still matter in 6 months?

Often, that pause cools the heat.

Step 2: Hunt the Swap / Preloved Version

Before hitting "buy new", I scan Sassybae, local swap groups, Facebook Marketplace, or check my local toy library. Many times, boom, the same (or better) toy for way less.

Step 3: Negotiate the “Trade‑In”

If I do agree to buy new, I tell the kids: “If this doesn’t get used in 3 months, we swap it or pass it on.” That way, it doesn’t become landfill fodder. As they get older they’re remembering that deal more and more. And honestly, after three months, they usually forget they even have it.

Step 4: Make “Giving On” Part of the Pact

When my kid gets bored or moves on, we pick one toy to swap, donate or trade at a toy swap event or take to the local op shop. It’s become a fun activity to do on the weekends rather than a tantrum-inducing battle.

Step 5: Celebrate the Story

When we get second-hand things, I try to give the toy a backstory or history (especially if it’s an action figure or plushie). The kids love hearing about all the adventures the toy had before ending up in our hands, and makes them excited for their own stories to be passed on.

Tips for Smart Second‑Hand Parenting

Of course, buying second-hand means navigating a minefield of inconsistent quality and, frankly, hygiene. It also requires not turning your second-hand toy right back into the landfill you just rescued it from. Here’s my check-list of things I try to consider when sealing the deal.

• Inspect carefully: Check for broken parts, sharp edges, missing pieces. Battery toys need secure compartments. Older toys won’t have screw-down battery compartments, so either pass them by or be prepared to secure it somehow.  (I tend to pass them by)

• Clean & sanitise: A good wash, mild soap, disinfecting the nooks makes most toys safe.

• Stick to classics / open‑ended toys: Blocks, dolls, puzzles, and things that use imagination rather than a specific play style are all things that remain useful across ages.

• Set “keep it” limits: We have a rule of only 1 new or “special” item per month, max.

• Teach your kids to care for their things: If it breaks, try to fix it. If it can’t be fixed, don’t replace it. Losing a toy because of mishandling is a natural consequence that helps kids learn (although we will replace a toy that’s destroyed by genuine accident, if we can).

Parent Qs & Objections (and How I Handle Them)

“But what about safety?”

Valid concern. Only accept second‑hand toys in good condition, with no cracks, sharp edges, or choking hazards. Avoid second‑hand car seats or cribs (more regulated).

“Won’t kids complain?”

This will depend on your child. We’ve been op-shopping with the kids since they can remember, so they see no real difference between getting a second-hand toy or a new one. It’s all new to them!

“Doesn’t this take more time?”

A little extra effort up front, sure. But over time it becomes muscle memory—and gets easier.

“Isn’t it just a cheap move?”

Is being frugal a bad thing? It’s not just a cheap move, no – it contributes to the environment, teaches the kids some lessons, and also lets them play with toys that we might not otherwise be able to afford.

“Dad, I want to keep it!” will burn into your brain and haunt you in your dreams – but stay strong. Maybe you’ll need to ease into second-hand toys, if your kids aren’t already used to it. Maybe you need to introduce it bit by bit. 

But sure enough, the cry of “But I want it (even though I haven’t played for it in six months)” will start to fade into a distant, haunting memory.